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Transforming Trauma with Ernest Ellender: From Clinical Psychologist to Black Belt Trauma Coach



Ernest Ellender
Ernest Ellender







In a recent episode of my podcast, I had the pleasure of speaking with Ernest Ellender, PhD, a remarkable trauma coach and third-degree black belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Our conversation delved into Ernest's unique journey, from his roots in Louisiana and academic pursuits in California and New York, to his specialized practice in trauma coaching. This blog post explores the insights and strategies Ernest shared, highlighting the importance of addressing childhood trauma and the innovative methods he employs in his practice.



Ernest Ellender's Journey

Ernest Ellender's path to becoming a trauma coach is as inspiring as it is unconventional. Growing up in Louisiana, Ernest developed a love for hunting, fishing, and swimming in the bayou. His academic journey took him to California, where he pursued a PhD in Clinical Psychology at Palo Alto, and later to New York for a one-year internship. Despite his extensive training and experience in clinical psychology, Ernest felt a calling to specialize further, particularly in trauma recovery.



From Clinical Psychology to Trauma Coaching

After years of practicing as a clinical psychologist, Ernest realized that his true passion lay in helping individuals overcome the lasting impacts of childhood trauma. He noticed that many of his clients were struggling with deep-seated issues stemming from their early years, and he felt constrained by the limitations of traditional clinical practice. This led him to transition into trauma coaching, where he could work more flexibly and focus on his area of expertise without the bureaucratic constraints of insurance mandates.



The Role of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu in Trauma Recovery

One of the most fascinating aspects of Ernest's approach is his integration of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu into trauma recovery. As a third-degree black belt, Ernest understands the physical and mental discipline required in martial arts. He uses these principles to help his clients build resilience, manage stress, and develop a sense of empowerment. Martial arts training provides a structured way to confront and overcome fears, which is crucial in the healing process.



Understanding Trauma Lies

A significant part of Ernest's work involves addressing what he calls "trauma lies." These are false beliefs that individuals develop as a result of their traumatic experiences. For example, a child who has been abused might internalize the belief that they are unworthy of love or that everyone who loves them will eventually hurt them. These trauma lies can have a profound impact on adult relationships and self-perception. Ernest's approach focuses on identifying and dismantling these lies, replacing them with healthier, more constructive beliefs.



Intergenerational Trauma

Ernest also shed light on the concept of intergenerational trauma, which refers to the transmission of trauma from one generation to the next. This can occur through behaviors, communication patterns, and even genetic changes. By addressing intergenerational trauma, Ernest helps his clients break the cycle of pain and create a healthier legacy for future generations.


Insights from "This is How We Heal from Painful Childhoods"

During our conversation, Ernest discussed his book, "This is How We Heal from Painful Childhoods." This practical guide offers valuable strategies for overcoming past trauma and fostering personal growth. The book emphasizes the importance of recognizing and addressing trauma lies, developing resilience through physical and mental practices, and understanding the broader context of intergenerational trauma.


Practical Strategies for Overcoming Trauma

Ernest shared several practical strategies for overcoming trauma that can benefit anyone seeking to heal from their past. These include:

  1. Breathing Exercises: Calming the nervous system through deep, controlled breathing.

  2. Physical Activity: Engaging in regular exercise, such as martial arts, to build physical and mental resilience.

  3. Mindfulness Practices: Incorporating mindfulness and meditation to stay grounded and present.

  4. Cognitive Restructuring: Identifying and challenging trauma lies to develop healthier thought patterns.

  5. Seeking Support: Connecting with supportive communities and seeking professional help when needed.


Conclusion

My conversation with Ernest Ellender was enlightening and filled with practical wisdom. His journey from clinical psychology to trauma coaching, combined with his innovative use of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, offers a unique perspective on trauma recovery. By addressing childhood trauma, intergenerational trauma, and the false beliefs that stem from these experiences, Ernest provides a comprehensive approach to healing. For anyone grappling with the effects of past trauma, Ernest's insights and strategies offer a beacon of hope and a path to lasting recovery.


To check out Ernest's book, "This is How We Heal from Painful Childhoods: A Practical Guide for Healing Past Intergenerational Stress and Trauma", head on over to Amazon (affiliate): ⁠https://amzn.to/46w9VEi






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